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Belting Down - Getting Towards Biblical


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More of a vertical sea with slots in it ...

Terry Pratchett.

28th June 2012 was described as a storm of a "once in 200 years" event, I should know, I visited the hospital twice, travelling time (total) should have been 40 minutes, took nearer 4 hours.

Couple of weeks ago was a "once in 100 years" event.

Tonights gearing up to be quite impressive ... probably.

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Stuart0742

More of a vertical sea with slots in it ...

Terry Pratchett.

28th June 2012 was described as a storm of a "once in 200 years" event, I should know, I visited the hospital twice, travelling time (total) should have been 40 minutes, took nearer 4 hours.

Couple of weeks ago was a "once in 100 years" event.

Tonights gearing up to be quite impressive ... probably.

There's a bit of drizzle in Sheffield lol

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dunsbyowl1867

Down here in Lincolnshire the rain would have worried Noah. Plague of locusts next? I think in the USA such things justify the view that the end times are approaching.....anyway wasn't Eric Idle a laugh?

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madannie77

Even had ridiculously heavy rain in Carlisle. Not that it bothers me: I live halfway up a hill and Carlisle has some lovely new flood defences after the damp spell in January 2005.

Not sure about the once in 2/20/200 years nonsense: I think it was heavier exactly four weeks ago, when the West Coast Main Line flooded (it hasn't this time). Some half-wit was out in it with a camera :blink::rolleyes::wacko:. This is not a grainy photo although I was using ISO 800, and I took it one handed, the other hand holding an umbrella in a vain attempt to keep the camera dry.

http://madannie.smug...GNmqBc&lb=1&s=A

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It threatened, it passed. I know Coldstream didn't catch it because my sister and brother-in-law are there tonight.

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The rain would have worried Noah.

May have posted this appropriate Marriott Edgar / Stanley Holloway monologue "Three H'appence a foot" before

I'll tell you an old-fashioned story

That Grandfather used to relate,

Of a joiner and building contractor;

'Is name, it were Sam Oglethwaite.

In a shop on the banks of the Irwell,

Old Sam used to follow 'is trade,

In a place you'll have 'eard of, called Bury;

You know, where black puddings is made.

One day, Sam were filling a knot 'ole

Wi' putty, when in thro' the door

Came an old feller fair wreathed wi' whiskers;

T'ould chap said 'Good morning, I'm Noah.'

Sam asked Noah what was 'is business,

And t'ould chap went on to remark,

That not liking the look of the weather,

'E were thinking of building an Ark.

'E'd gotten the wood for the bulwarks,

And all t'other shipbuilding junk,

And wanted some nice Bird's Eye Maple

To panel the side of 'is bunk.

Now Maple were Sam's Monopoly;

That means it were all 'is to cut,

And nobody else 'adn't got none;

So 'e asked Noah three ha'pence a foot.

'A ha'penny too much,' replied Noah

'A Penny a foot's more the mark;

A penny a foot, and when t'rain comes,

I'll give you a ride in me Ark.'

But neither would budge in the bargain;

The whole daft thing were kind of a jam,

So Sam put 'is tongue out at Noah,

And Noah made rude signs at Sam

In wrath and ill-feeling they parted,

Not knowing when they'd meet again,

And Sam had forgot all about it,

'Til one day it started to rain.

It rained and it rained for a fortni't,

And flooded the 'ole countryside.

It rained and it kept' on raining,

'Til the Irwell were fifty mile wide.

The 'ouses were soon under water,

And folks to the roof 'ad to climb.

They said 'twas the rottenest summer

That Bury 'ad 'ad for some time.

The rain showed no sign of abating,

And water rose hour by hour,

'Til the only dry land were at Blackpool,

And that were on top of the Tower.

So Sam started swimming to Blackpool;

It took 'im best part of a week.

'Is clothes were wet through when 'e got there,

And 'is boots were beginning to leak.

'E stood to 'is watch-chain in water,

On Tower top, just before dark,

When who should come sailing towards 'im

But old Noah, steering 'is Ark.

They stared at each other in silence,

'Til Ark were alongside, all but,

Then Noah said: 'What price yer Maple?'

Sam answered 'Three ha'pence a foot.'

Noah said 'Nay; I'll make thee an offer,

The same as I did t'other day.

A penny a foot and a free ride.

Now, come on, lad, what does tha say?'

'Three ha'pence a foot,' came the answer.

So Noah 'is sail 'ad to hoist,

And sailed off again in a dudgeon,

While Sam stood determined, but moist.

Noah cruised around, flying 'is pigeons,

'Til fortieth day of the wet,

And on 'is way back, passing Blackpool,

'E saw old Sam standing there yet.

'Is chin just stuck out of the water;

A comical figure 'e cut,

Noah said: 'Now what's the price of yer Maple?'

Sam answered: 'Three ha'pence a foot.'

Said Noah: 'Ye'd best take my offer;

It's last time I'll be hereabout;

And if water comes half an inch higher,

I'll happen get Maple for nowt.'

'Three ha'pence a foot it'll cost yer,

And as fer me,' Sam said, 'don't fret.

The sky's took a turn since this morning;

I think it'll brighten up yet.'

"Nay lad thart wrong

It'll rain a lot more I'll be bound

Come on lad, sell us thi Maple"

"***! off" said Sam, - and then drowned.

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.....anyway wasn't Eric Idle a laugh?

Was he still looking on the bright side of life?

Some things in life are bad

They can really make you mad

Other things just make you swear and curse.

When you're chewing on life's gristle

Don't grumble, give a whistle

And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...

Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten

There's something you've forgotten

And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.

When you're feeling in the dumps

Don't be silly chumps

Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...

Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd

And death's the final word

You must always face the curtain with a bow.

Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin

Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death

Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit

When you look at it

Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.

You'll see it's all a show

Keep 'em laughing as you go

Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...

Always look on the right side of life...

(Come on guys, cheer up!)

Always look on the bright side of life...

Always look on the bright side of life...

(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)

Always look on the bright side of life...

(I mean - what have you got to lose?)

(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.

What have you lost? Nothing!)

Always look on the right side of life...

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This is not a grainy photo although I was using ISO 800

ISO is a way of measuring film speed based on silver halide (ie film) photographic technology.

So it always amuses me that digital cameras, - which have never seen or used a roll of film, still use the same scale to measure the light sensitivity as the older film cameras.

My digital camera handbook has a section entitled "Setting the film speed (ISO)"

It really is perverse, - its a bit like having to place the laser beam onto the first track of a spinning CD by hand.

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Just got back from a few days in Suffolk. Weather's been great. Sorry!

Weather was also OK in Cambridgeshire last Wednesday when I was down there, - apart from a quick thunderstorm mid afternoon.

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